He Touched Me

Five years ago Jesus delivered me from my 23-year habit of drugs. I had more than one drug of choice in my life, but the main one that seemed to follow me through was pot.

I started smoking pot at the age of 13 and after about the age of 15, I really don’t remember too many days that I went without it. If I was unable to find it for a short period of time because the town was “dry”, I would do something else to numb myself, usually get drunk. Basically, for 23 years, I did some sort of mind altering, mood altering substance everyday.

“And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery; but ever be filled and stimulated with the Holy Spirit.” Ephesians 5:18 AMP

My life was messed up; I was in and out of relationships, marriages and affairs. I used men and drugs to fill the space inside of me that only God could fill. I was (as my Pastor would say) “worshipping Baal”. I tried all kinds of self-improvement, I read books, listened to tapes and attended workshops. I strived, I mean I REALLY STRIVED, I worked and worked and used all the energy I had until I gave up. Then I would shame myself for failing and get up the energy and try again. I was trying to change my character traits, my behaviors, the circumstances of my life and my unhappiness. But I was looking in all the wrong places. For more details see my testimony, (Prodigal Daughter) at www.restforyoursoul.org

“So kill (deaden, deprive of power) the evil desire lurking in your members (those animal impulses and all that is earthly in you that is employed in sin): sexual vice, impurity, sensual appetites, unholy desires, and all greed and covetousness, for that is idolatry (deifying of self and other created things instead of God).” Colossians 3:5 AMP

I’ve been a Christian since December of 1994, yet I didn’t quit drinking and doing drugs until August 1996. I did quit using men though; I had made the decision to be celibate. The reason for the celibacy was not for any spiritual reason at first, it was because my ex-husband had been cheating on me for over 3 years and I wanted to see if I had any STD’s (Sexually Transmitted Disease).

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory just as by the Spirit of the Lord.” II Corinthians 3:18 NKJV

I had been praying God would help me to quit drugs, but then I would be afraid and add to my prayer “but please don’t let me get busted!” God is good, He delivered me and I wasn’t busted.

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God” Philippians 4:6

(Due to the length of this story it will be continued in my next article entitled “Freeze Tag”)