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Inside Out Love

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I sometimes complain when I go with my husband Bill on photo shoots or meeting new clients but I shouldn’t because something usually happens that makes it all worthwhile.

Last fall Bill was with a mother and daughter shooting senior pictures and her dad met us in the parking lot to drop off some glitter his daughter wanted. He stopped to chat and told Bill he heard the photos were turning out great. Then the father added “well, she’s so beautiful” and the daughter just rolled her eyes like she was saying “oh, Dad; stop it”. I got the impression she’d heard this many times from her Dad.

I realized I never heard I was beautiful from my parents. I wonder what it would’ve been like for me. Would I be different now if I heard it regularly in my life? I struggle with image management and insecurity and I can’t help but think that if I grew up hearing I was beautiful from people who loved me I would be different now. I hope this experience helps me to remember to say these kinds of things to my nieces and nephews. People need to hear the truth spoken to them by key people in their lives.

A few weeks ago, I went with Bill to meet potential wedding clients. The woman was telling a story about photos and how important they are. Her aunt died a few months ago and she was given a photo of both of them at her aunt’s wedding, she was just 2 years old. In the photo she could tell that her aunt loved her with “inside out” love. She explained that she loved her nieces and nephews with this “inside out” love and she understood it. When she looked at this photo she could see that she was loved this same way by her aunt. It made me think about inside out love. I understand that phrase and I know what that love is like. I have it for my nephews and nieces, I have it for my family members. I used to question whether my family loved me that way and now I know they did, and still do.

We all do the best we can at the time with the tools that we have. We’re all flawed and the tools we have in our tool box may be limited but it’s what we have to work with. The experiences in our lives have shaped and formed us into who we are today. We can’t give away what we haven’t received. Sometimes it comes out sideways or we have trouble expressing it but it’s the best we can do. We need to cut ourselves and the people in our lives some slack. I’m going to try and give my loved ones grace when they don’t love me perfectly and remember that they are doing the best they can to love me with inside out love.

 



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