Today I found myself thinking about church culture—how it shapes people, and how, if we’re willing, it can change us.
When I was hired at the church I attend, I was told we hire based on three “c’s”, competency, character and culture. We talked about how important each one is. Competency and character you need to come with, but I think culture can be acquired. Culture isn’t just the way we dress or the style of music we sing. It’s the shared values that shape how we live, love, and follow Jesus together.
When I started attending church after being away for 20 years. Things were different, there was praise/worship music with a band up front instead of an organist in the balcony playing hymns that we all sang along with from a hymnal. The church I grew up in wasn’t a place I would choose for myself, which is part of the reason I left. It was a neighborhood church, the people at the church were folks who lived next door, across the street, and down the block from me. I knew them. However, as a child it seemed to me that people became different versions of themselves on Sunday. They got dressed up in their “church clothes” and they put on more than clothes, they put on a mask, a version of themselves they wanted you to see. But the person I saw at church wasn’t the person who lived next door to me.
The first time I entered the building where my current church worshiped after 20 years away from any church, surprised me. People didn’t dress up and along with that, they didn’t put on a mask and an image. Well, I’m sure maybe some did, I think I did. I was on guard because I wasn’t sure what to expect. But, after being there I started to see what it was about. The culture of this church was different. Truth was spoken, and it was spoken in love. But because it was truth, it sometimes offended. That didn’t stop them, the folks here cared enough about me, and my soul that they were willing to risk offending me if that’s what it took. Jesus offended many people—not because He was harsh, but because truth exposes what we’d rather keep hidden. When truth is spoken with genuine love, it can still be uncomfortable. In fact, the lead Pastor more than once said (after a tough message) that this church isn’t for everyone; not every church is. If this church isn’t for you, please find one that is and go there. I found this to be refreshing! The church I knew from before was one where numbers mattered. More people meant success. This culture of truth, transparency, and vulnerability drew me in. I didn’t arrive with those values already formed in me, but I wanted them. I wanted to live that way. So, I stayed. Over time, I changed. Jesus changed me. I wanted what I found here. Now, it’s a way of life.
It doesn’t mean we’re so open that we air out every dust particle and spiderweb – there is wisdom in being authentic without oversharing, as Scripture says don’t cast your pearls before swine. But we are a safe space, where people can be open about what they’re dealing with in life. We’re not perfect but we are real. This is the culture that drew me in.
What I’ve learned is that you don’t have to arrive with the right culture already in you. You just need a heart that’s willing to be shaped by it. If you’re drawn to a community that loves Jesus, loves His Word, and lives authentically, He will do the transforming. That’s what He did for me.
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